You know what's great about my job?
Sometimes I'm allowed into the trenches of other people's pain so deep that most of us couldn't fathom the abyss.
It's a sacred and privileged place where not just anyone is allowed to tread. I think I used to be one of those people who avoided this space like the plague...whether it be my own pain or anyone else's.
To others, I'd offer a typical trite response alluding to some probability of a silver-lining-esque outcome and they'd force a half-smile half trying to make me feel helpful and half hoping I would shut-up.
I was such an asshole.
They were in the depths of hell and I was talking about the goddamn clouds.
Now, after a few degrees, I get that I wasn't just cheating them out of some decent support and connection...I was cheating myself, too.
With the confidence to walk into someone else's hell, sure... I get to see the worst, but over time I also get to see the absolute, most jaw-dropping, better-than-anything-on-TV best.
I get to see people rise up in ways they never thought they could. I struggle putting into words this part of my job when people say some version of, "Gawd, I don't know how you do what you do..." (I'm a therapist).
I don't understand how you don't.
People are fucking amazing.
When we avoid the vulnerability required to feel, or walk with someone in, the trenches of pain...we also miss out on the vulnerability required to experience deep connection and pure joy.
Avoiding someone who's struggling? Do the thing that makes you most uncomfortable: show up on their doorstep with nothing silver-lining-esque to say instead of texting. You'll never regret it.